Instant Replay ~ long but worth it.

Growing up in the country, you have friends, but not too many living near you. Out of the ones that do live near you, there may be one or two your age, that you like to play with. Melanie and I grew up across the street from each other. Now that I live on a postage stamp lot, in a cookie cutter house, I am very appreciative of the fact that she was there, even though I couldn't see her house. We all had acreage. Many of us with HUGE trees. Wow, do I miss that.

Unfortunately I have a memory that isn't so pleasant. And now E is going through a very similar situation. Melanie and I always got along beautifully. We played together all the time. But there was one girl on our street that just couldn't manage to be friends with both of us. And if we were friends with her, she would make us choose sides. She was a wedge. With her it was all or nothing. When you are so limited on your friends, you sometimes have to take the bad with the good, just to have someone to play with. Until you suddenly realize that the one person that remains consistant, and true is the one you want to be with. We all know who that is.... Melanie.

E is in 3rd grade now. She is really coming into herself and is such a beautiful person. She is very fair, and loves to play with her friends. Occasionally she gets what my neighbor calls "cruise director" syndrome. But not too often.

A couple weeks ago, on a Thursday, I told E that if she got her Dumpola cleaned up, she could have a friend over. This child spent 6... count em' SIX hours cleaning her room. She talked to her friend, got all the OK's and was in her glory. Personally I'd wished she asked someone else, because this friend sure seems to yank E's chain quite a bit. For example, during E's birthday sleepover with 6 other girls, the girl that I am writing about, called her mother about 7 times, hanging on the phone line. She lead E on for hours, not knowing if she "wanted" to spend the night or not. At 10 pm that night, her mother comes in, carrying A's "sleepover" stuff.

Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. That Friday, A came home with E. At first she was unsure if she wanted to spend the night. I told A that we needed to know, because I like things to be set in concrete. I don't like to "not know" what is going on. (You knew that about me, right?)
They had the BEST time playing all day. We went out to dinner. Then S came down the street. She is in class with A & E. They all play together at school. they played, did computer games. They really had fun. Around 7 pm that evening, E disappeared. A & S thought she hid on them to scare them. When we went looking for E, I found her. Curled up in her bed, sobbing. My heart broke.

Apparently while they were playing, A asked to use the phone to call her mom. When her mom answered, she said, "Can you come get me? I'm ready to come home." The child that spent 6 hours cleaning her room, for this girl to come over, was devistated.

When A entered E's room, it was a war. I saw a side of my child that I have NEVER seen before. Literally, my hair was blowing back from the pent up aggravation that was releasing in my child. She went off on A, telling her what she had gone through, and how she spent all that time cleaning her room, when she thought A was going to spend the night. And here A just decided not to. It got so ugly that I called A's mom. Repeatedly at that because she was no where to be found. When she finally called me back, they were out to dinner. I told her, "A & E have had a serious falling out. I'm talking potential end of the friendship here. You need to come and get A."

The mother then says, "do you want me to talk to her?" "NO! That isn't going to change anything, come get her", I replied. "Ok, when our food comes, we're going to eat then we'll be there."

Helloooooooo? Is anybody home? I have two 8 year olds that are about to kill each other, but you go ahead and eat your potpie ok?! I'll just go throw on my referee shirt.

An hour later, A's parents arrive, and so did the theatrics. As soon as she saw her mother, A, who had not shown ANY emotion until now, turned on the faucets. My jawl dropped wide open.

I was SURE that this friendship was over, and personally, I was glad to accept that. Although my heart was broken, because so was my child's. She was devistated, then she said it, "You and Dad were right. I should have listened to you". Every parents DREAM statement. We had told her that we didn't think A was treating her right, which was apparent from the birthday manipulation".

To make a very long story short, I would like to say that E has forgiven A, and has NO plans to invite her to any sleepovers in the near future. However, they have been playing at school. Today E told me that A is ignoring her because she is playing with S again.

It's an Instant Replay of Jeni Lane... where I grew up.